My Gastric Sleeve Surgery

(Fair Warning Again - Another long post ......Written between post-op days 5 through 7)

I finally did it.  After years of saying I wouldn’t, but secretly wanting to, I had bariatric weight loss surgery.  In the back of my mind for a while, I truly thought this would be the “easy way” to get rid of my weight problem…cut down how much I can eat, and problem solved, right?  I have come to discover that this isn’t easy, it isn’t GOING TO BE easy, and if I could give anyone any kind of advice, I would tell them to think this through VERY carefully...if you are anything like me, you will want to eat again as early as the afternoon after your surgery.  My problem with food is not in my belly.  It is in my head.  No surgery for that, folks.

I have been overweight pretty much my entire life.  I have rarely NOT been the biggest kid in my class.  I grew up constantly hearing, “She has such a pretty face.  If only she could lose that weight…”  I had wonderful friends in high school who accepted me for who I was, but my head kept telling me that I was fat.  

I tried diets…my pattern that began in high school (I’m 47 now) was to lose anywhere from 20-30 pounds and then fall off the proverbial wagon to begin eating old-style.  Sometimes diets lasted weeks, and sometimes they lasted months.  Nothing ever changed, though.  I guess I thought some inner switch would click, and I’d magically develop a distaste of potato chips and bologna.  Who knows?  Also, as my age increased, my weight increased.  I’m not an exerciser anymore, never really was even though I had “active” times in my life, so that probably “helped.”  My highest weight has been around 282, I think…I tended to avoid weighing at this time in my life, for obvious reasons.  You know – a problem doesn’t really exist if you can’t see it.

While I was hiding my eyes, my weight stayed high, and my activity level decreased further – what a surprise.   I developed type 2 diabetes, my hormones got more and more out-of-whack, I keep fairly consistent ankle edema that is more pronounced in my left ankle, I discovered I’m infertile (probably thanks to PCOS), my diabetes contributed to neuropathy in my feet, I became further depressed, I woke my husband in the night with my snoring, my blood pressure and cholesterol levels went down unsavory paths, and I took lovely meds/supplements for a lot of this…and I HATE taking pills, so that, of course, just pissed me off.  Mostly, I felt utterly helpless, but somewhere in there, I was angry….at myself, at life, at choices, at “luck,” at my parents, at people who judged me, at short seat belts, at WHATEVER I could be angry at.  I felt desperate.  Maybe I’d hit my “bottom.”

So, several months ago, after a lot of thought and a bunch of initial research about weight loss surgery, I finally asked my primary care physician, “Do you think I’d be a good candidate for weight loss surgery?  Am I crazy for thinking about doing this?”  Her response, without hesitation, was, “Yes, you’d be a great candidate for it.  And I think you’d be crazy NOT to do it.”  I think this was the moment in time when the curtains opened, the clouds floated away, the sun began shining, and I began smiling for the first time in a long time at all the possibilities of life.

My research continued through internet digging and talking with family, friends, and acquaintances who had undergone weight loss surgery.  I quickly discovered that the gastric sleeve was my preference.  The reports of disease resolution (diabetes) almost immediately after surgery were a huge factor in my decision.  Also, since swallowing pills isn’t my preference, I liked the idea that a “sleeve” of my original stomach would remain to absorb nutrients.  (I still have to take a few pills, though, but I can handle this!)  There were other reasons, but disease resolution and vitamin/nutrient absorption were the biggest reasons why I chose the sleeve.  (Note:  Disease resolution is common with roux-en-y/bypass surgery, too, but the drastic nature of the RNY was a huge turn-off, for some reason.)

Fast forward a few months, and I had jumped through all the necessary hoops for my insurance (BCBS of MS) to cover my surgery.  For anyone interested in/needing to know everything that was involved for me, I will TRY to recall everything and include the price I paid.

**Documentation of weight problems for 2 years

**6 consecutive months of documented weight loss management visits with a physician

**Psychological evaluation - $450

**An initial orientation group meeting at my surgeon’s office that provided general info on different surgeries, etc. – free unless you met with the surgeon after - $150

**A group nutrition meeting where you learned a new way to eat in preparation for surgery - $45

**A follow-up one-on-one meeting with a nutritionist to examine a menu/chart you kept to see how your eating has been going - $45

**Another group nutrition meeting where you learned about how to eat after surgery - $45

**Pre-op testing (an upper GI, lab/blood work, chest x-ray, and an EKG) - $150 deposit with hospital where I had it done locally (after the results from these reached the surgeon’s office, surgery was officially scheduled)

**A couple of days prior to surgery, I pre-admitted with my surgeon (met with him, reviewed the procedure, discussed changes that must be made on my part in order for the surgery to be successful long term,  got a bag of goodies and a couple of prescriptions – pain meds and anti-nausea patch – and other directions from the nurse, and paid his office)

**Pre-admitted with the hospital (verified information and paid them).)  (All of my fees applied to my deductible, so the amounts I paid to the surgeon and the hospital were the remaining portions of my deductible before my insurance paid 100%.  Total out-of-pocket for myself at this point was around $3,000-ish.)  FYI…I live about 90 miles from my surgeon’s office and the hospital where my surgery was done.  Cost of transportation is not calculated in my grand-ish total.

My surgery was officially scheduled for Tuesday, June 17, 2014.  On Monday, 6/16, I was restricted to clear fluids (water, Crystal Light, low sodium broth, Gatorade) all day.  At 5pm, I had to put an anti-nausea patch behind my ear and begin drinking a bottle of magnesium citrate.  Directions at this point were to “stay near a bathroom,” so that’s what I did.  Nothing by mouth was allowed after midnight.  I despise needles, so I was determined to be well-hydrated the day before surgery so any poking and prodding would be as flawless as possible.  I was fortunate to be able to stay the night before surgery in a hotel nearer the hospital than where I lived…thanks, Mom!  I was scheduled to be at the hospital by 5:15am.

Once I arrived, I was thoroughly scrubbed from head to toe, even inside my nostrils, and my IV line was inserted.  (Unfortunately, that was the only poke that was easy while I was there – OY!)  I was wheeled into a surgery room, dressed in a cute little blue cap, given some oxygen through a thick mask, and blinked once…maybe twice.  When I opened my eyes, I was waking up in recovery.   However, according to my husband, here’s something closer to the real schedule:

6:30 – I left prep room for holding/pre-op

7:00 – Hubby and mom got a card with an ID number and color-coding to follow surgical process

8:00 – I went into operating room

8:35 – Surgery began

10:00 – Surgery completed

10:15 – Hubby and mom met with surgeon who said it was a “boring” surgery

11:00 – I arrived in hospital room

All things considered, the pain was not that bad.  The hospital staff was great, and I have no complaints – other than the inability to hit a vein on the first try.  They were prompt, helpful, and friendly about any and all requests I had.  Lunch was happily delivered - about 20cc of chicken broth, a 20oz bottle of water, and an individual Crystal Light lemonade mix to put in the water.  Supper was the same, but the broth may have been vegetable broth, and the lemonade was now peach tea.  I remember getting a couple of Flintstone’s chewable vitamins and some chewable antacids, as well as a couple of doses of liquid Reglan for nausea prevention (of which I had NONE).  Besides this, I watched television and napped all day.

I did not anticipate the gruffness in my throat due to intubation, and thankfully, I had a “cough buddy,” a hard-stuffed teddy bear, to press against my incisions to help me get the flegm up and out.  (I was resistant to using this, but eventually, I figured out and trusted that it wasn’t going to hurt nearly as badly when I coughed if I pressed that bear to my belly.  This dear bear came in handy later at home when I needed to blow my nose and protect myself from random cat visits.)  The roughness in my voice was markedly better the following day, and was pretty much gone within 2-3 days.

My belly, post-op day 7,
with its 6 lovely incisions.

My worst pain has come primarily from my largest incision, where, I’m told, the surgeon either had the camera or removed the stomach.  I am 5 days post-op (Sunday), and it is still tender and a bit uncomfortable when I stand up straight – as if letting it hang is pulling on something uncomfortably inside.  In the photo, it's the incision on the bottom left. (I look bloated!...I probably am!)  While I was in the hospital, these steri-strips covering the incisions were also covered with a large patch-band-aid thingie.  Those were removed before I went home, but they have left me with some itchy spots.  The steri-strip covering the uppermost incision fell off today during my bath.  Yay!  (I NEVER thought I'd ever put a picture of my belly online for the world to see!)

I dealt with a bit of a gas problem, due to the laparoscopic nature of the surgery.  Some research had me expecting pain in my shoulder, but I discovered that it centralized just below my diaphragm (near the bottom of my ribs) after a couple of days.  I eventually found that taking 2 Gas-X strips at night before bed helped me tremendously.  I incorporated a little walking, per internet recommendations, but that was uncomfortable for me since I felt a bit of pain trying to stand up straight.  And, hunching over for extended periods created fatigue in my back.  My movement mostly involved prepping my meals/fluids, going to the bathroom, showering, minimal housework (doing dishes, picking up clothing, feeding the pets) and rolling over in bed – something that required more of me than I anticipated.  I did walk; I just didn’t do as much as I was told to do.

I have been following a liquid diet, and with the exception of about 2-3 tablespoons of applesauce mixed in with some yogurt and milk yesterday, I have stayed with it.  I average about 70-75 grams of protein daily through protein shakes, skim milk, and no-fat plain Greek yogurt, I take 2 bariatric multivitamins with iron, 2 bariatric calcium citrate supplements, and 1 B-12 supplement, all chewable, and the rest of my time is spent hydrating with water, sugar-free popsicles, sugar-free Jell-O, Crystal Light, and Dasani Drops.  (I’m trying to stick to Splenda as an artificial sweetener right now because aspartame has given me headaches in the past.)  My calorie intake averages about 760/day.

Random Unanticipated Things: 

I needed help during my first shower to wash my feet and dry crevices that required bending.  Second shower at home was uncomfortable and slow, but I did it all myself.  I also THOROUGHLY enjoyed letting very warm water run down my back to ease the hunching-back pain.

I missed giving my nose a good blow.  I couldn’t do this until about 6 days post-op, and only with the help of the “Cough Buddy” bear.

I didn’t poop until 6-7 days post-op, which is odd for me because I’m a daily pooper – sometimes twice in a day.  Considering, though, I had had liquids on 6/16 ending in a laxative that evening, and I had not had anything but liquids since the surgery.  I decided to employ the Walmart brand of Miralax.  I took two doses – midday and evening, on post-op day 5.  I had a BM first thing in the morning day 6, and the remainder of the day was graced with about 4-5 gaseous, minimally-productive bathroom trips.  In retrospect, I probably should have had only one dose of the “miralax” around post-op day 3 and let that be that.  I am still considering another dose, just in case, but I haven’t had that third quite yet.

The pain has truly been minimal.  With the exception of the one major incision and some gas pain, I could classify any other pain related to surgery as minimally irritating.  I took 4 morphine hits in the hospital just to help me relax and sleep...not for pain.  Since I've been home, I've had only one dose of pain meds for the same reason.  The gas pain subsided around post-op day 5-6, and the major incision isn't even really tender to the touch, depending on how hard you push on it.  I even sneezed yesterday, and though I imagined my guts flying out of my abdomen simultaneously, I gently pressed my flattened palm on the incision as if I had my “Cough Buddy” bear and felt no pain at all.  I do feel internal pain, but only a bit, when I move, so I still move slowly.  Today is post-op day 7.

I have read that many gain weight during the first week after surgery, citing the fluids received in the hospital.  This has not been my experience.  As of this morning (post-op day 7), I am down 11 pounds.  I am happy to report that I now weigh less than my husband…by 2 pounds.  I giggled.  He scowled.  The weight has, so far, dropped steadily…a pound here, two pounds there.  It is nice to watch my face, specifically the part that I call my “fat beard” that goes from ear to ear along my jaw line, fading.  I hate that thing; it makes my face look like an equilateral triangle…so unflattering, in my opinion.

I am thoroughly enjoying looking at my real ankles.  No swelling in sight!  I still have my neuropathy issues, though.  I wasn’t really expecting to get rid of that, but I was hoping.

My blood glucose levels are not at “normal” (below 90) yet, but the 110-ish I’ve been getting here lately is far better than the 140-165 I was getting.

I am tired of eating.  I just want to rest and relax and watch television.  Don’t get me wrong – I do have energy to do things, but I am tired of eating every few hours.  (Keep in mind that it will take about an hour to eat a protein shake at this point.  Drinking fluids – sipping, not gulping or guzzling – takes a while, too, and since I’m always doing one or the other, I’m always “feeding” myself.)

Some people reported having problems with cold or hot beverages.  I have more problems with cold things, except for popsicles, for whatever reason.  The thicker the mixture, too, the more uncomfortable it is.  Here’s what I mean…My meals alternate between protein shakes (a scoop of protein mix and 8oz. of water or skim milk) and yogurt smoothie-type things (1/2 c. skim milk, ½ c. FF Greek yogurt, water enhancer flavoring).  These yogurt drinks give me just a twinge of discomfort about 20-30 seconds after I swallow most every sip.  I get a similar feeling when I drink plain ol’ water with Crystal Light with ICE.  I’ve started omitting the ice, and that helps.  I have yet to discover why I don’t have a problem with the SF popsicles, though.  THOSE HAVE BEEN A GODSEND.  So glad I stocked up!!  They taste good, I feel like I’m actually eating something, and I’m getting hydrated all in one.  Win-win-win.

Going ahead and buying the bariatric surgery optimized supplements was a GOOD INVESTMENT.  They are not disgusting, though not my favorite things in the world, and since they are optimized and pretty much have twice what you need from regular chewable supplements, you don’t have to be taking them every second of the day.

I think about eating a LOT.  I thought I would stop after I had the surgery – why, I don’t know – but I didn’t.  Even the day I had my surgery, as I was walking around the hospital floor, I was KEENLY aware of the smell of chocolate cake every time I passed by the nurses’ station.  OH MY GOSH!  And now, seven days out, I’m bored with liquids, and I’m researching things to eat in Stage 2 (pureed) and beyond, so I really want to chew on something tasty.  There are those Frito’s or honey buns on top of the fridge calling my name, and one of the fish sticks my husband made last night just smelled wonderfully delicious and would make a tasty little mini-sandwich.  Fish is GOOD FOR YOU, RIGHT?!?  ARGH!  Honestly, though, I am NOT HUNGRY.  I just want to eat.  I guess this is what they call “head hunger.”  I will be working on this, for sure, and I am glad to have read about it ahead of time and be AWARE of it.  The bright side is that I have this craving for all these salsas I keep seeing – cucumbers, chick peas, feta, quinoa, etc.  Not a bad craving to have, if I have to say so myself.  Come on, Stage 3!!

My husband happily reports that I am not snoring like I used to...its is a quiet snore.  So, he's definitely getting better sleep as a result of my surgery.  And when Papa is happy....well, who cares.  How's Mama doing?  Just kidding!!

After the first few days of tiny sips, I realized that I could actually take a fairly normal-sized/average swallow of water….not an entire mouthful, mind you.  And, I don’t recommend doing this multiple times in succession, either.  While water pretty much goes straight through, it does take it a few seconds.  I will be taking average swallows with pauses between each.  I have not had a problem with overfilling my pouch (The word “stomach” becomes “pouch” post-op, interestingly enough.), but I realize that, with fluids, I don’t have to baby it as much as I thought.  FYI…I learned that protein shakes/liquids/yogurt/soft foods can be referred to as “sliders” because they essentially slide through the pouch.  Later, with “normal” foods, it will be essential for me to monitor the amount I’m eating and keep it under 4oz.

---

I guess I’m discovering that my experience will be similar to some and different from others.  No surprise there.  I’m also discovering that this is not the “easy way out” of losing weight.  It does take work.  It does take commitment – commitment to change, to improvement, to health, to exercise…to recognizing that the way I thought before surgery was full of hooey, and I need to re-think a lot of things.  Old thinking got me close to 300 pounds of person.  I cannot allow that thinking to take hold again – EVER.

Kitty Go POOP!!

The dissertation is coming along - nicely, I suppose. All chapters have been written, and are going through the editing process. (There are, in my head, three editing steps. Step one is being edited by my major professor. Step two is being edited by a second committee member who also agreed to serve as my reader. The final step is for my entire document to be read by all my committee members.) Chapter 1 has been through step 1 and is perhaps ready for 2. Chapter 2 has made it all the way through steps 1 and 2! Chapter 3, my longest chapter, in about 1/4 of the way through step 1. I still have a ways to go, but at least this stuff is on paper and somewhat out of my head.

In the meantime, I have also been dealing with a sick cat. Understand that I say "sick" because I don't want to say "old." She has just turned 12, and to me, that is not THAT old for a cat. I just don't want to face the possibility of "letting go." I'm sure that's understandable. At any rate, my oldest daughter, Miss Cleopatra Clementine Garlotte - Miss Cleo, is experiencing a nice handful of symptoms...lethargy, lack of appetite, grumpiness, and the biggie - constipation. It seems, though, that we've figured out a nice working remedy for the constipation, and I wanted to share it.

After researching online and talking with my vet, I tried a few of the remedies for the constipation. Most of the sites recommend plain, canned pumpkin (as opposed to pumpkin pie filling which contains spices and other schtuff) to increase the fiber in her diet. Being the picky eater that she is, coupled with her lack of appetite, she was not AT ALL interested in eating the pumpkin herself. I mixed it with some warm water and assisted her feeding with a syringe. I am a poop-checker, and I noticed that, when she was able to evacuate, there were areas of orange, so I knew the pumpkin was working its way through her system. At one point, I even fed her at least half a (3ml) syringe full of mineral oil, and instead of getting a nice, moist poop, my cat ended up with a greasy, orange hiney...apparently, I loaded her up with mineral oil right after a hit of pumpkin. Not only was I cleaning up orange stains wherever she chose to sit/sleep, she was NOT happy...AND worse, her evacuation eventually became less frequent, as did her urination.

I spoke with the vet again, and he determined that Miss Cleo was indeed constipated and needed another enema. (She had received an enema before at the vets, with sedation, but because of time constraints, this conversation occuring on Friday afternoon, the vet would not be able to sedate and evacuate Cleo again until Monday at the earliest.) So, I suggested performing the enema myself at home. (I do not necessarily recommend this, y'all!! Imagine your husband holding your large, EXTREEEEEMELY grumpy cat down while you try to carefully go where you have NEVER been before and never thought you'd ever go. Well, let me just put it this way....it was traumatic for all. 'Nuff said.) Let me just cut to the chase with this enema thing...it wasn't easy, it took a little time and patience, but I'm glad we did it. Miss Cleo had two bowel movements within about a half hour's time.

The vet also outlined a diet plan including a combination of lubrication, fiber, and probiotics. He also sent me home with some more prednisone. (She had already been on prednisone, but she wasn't really responding to the 1/4 pill I was giving her every other day, so the vet upped the dosage a bit to give her a kickstart.) He suggested mineral oil, psyllium and/or pumpkin, and plain yogurt. Off I went to Walmart to grocery shop for my cat, and here is what I learned.....the only psyllium I felt I could use was the 100% psyllium kind. That only existed in little capsules. Other psyllium fiber laxatives contain a sweetener, and most contained an orange flavor. (How can you hide ORANGE FLAVOR from a cat?!?) Thankfully, the capsules were the Equate brand, and bonus! - they were the cheapest option!! Since the capsules refuse to slide apart, I just cut off the end of a capsule to dispense the contents into the food. Of course, Walmart bites me in the butt by only selling plain yogurt in that large, quart size. (Really? No one wants a SMALL plain yogurt, Walmart??! Have you ever tasted that stuff?? Plain yogurt should ONLY come in small containers.) I had mineral oil and pumpkin at home, so they were not on my list. I can hear you now...."Okay, Shelly, get to the point. I wanna know how to fix my cat's constipation, dangit!"

Understand that during the day Cleo eats water-saturated feline Prescription C/D (hard food) and gets occasional teaspoons of canned C/D or A/D when she gives us that "I want something different" stare. HOWEVER, here's where I landed with Cleo's SUPPLEMENTARY diet.....

Each morning, she receives an assisted feeding of a heaping teaspoon of plain yogurt mixed with a few teaspoons of warm water, and half the contents of a psyllium fiber capsule mixed together very well (about the consistency of melted ice cream). I suck it up in the syringe, and try to convince Miss Cleo that this is the best-tasting stuff EVER while I dispense it in small squirts to the side of her mouth. (Ever had a yogurt shower?)

Every evening before I go to bed, Miss Cleo receives a teaspoon of canned Prescription A/D mixed with ~2/3 teaspoon of mineral oil, a couple of teaspoons of warm water, and the other half of the contents of the fiber capsule. I mix it together very well (thankfully, canned A/D becomes very smooth/creamy, and this mixture looks like slightly greasy gravy), and dispense as I did with the morning mixture. I follow this evening-time "supplement" with a full syringe of water. Yes, my cat hates me, but she must know that I love her, right??

We have been on the above routine for about a week. As of yesterday, she is consistently producing an almost daily pile of nice, healthy fecal matter...moist, but not runny at all...firm and formed, but not hard. I have not observed her while she is evacuating, she seems to do it in the middle of the night, but my guess is that she isn't working NEARLY as hard as she was. (Thank you, God!! When she was "working," it took great effort and about 2 minutes to produce one lump the size of a small grape.) And with the bowels adequately evacuated, her urination is consistent as well. I plan to keep up this routine, especially since it is one that will work nicely with my schedule once I go back to teaching after summer break....but do keep us on your kitty prayer list. :)

(If this ends up helping anyone, please do let me know about your experience!)

I think I have a coupon for that...

Wow! It's been a while since last I wrote! There are a couple of good reasons for that - I'm supposed to be writing a dissertation, and I've been couponing!

Inspired by the Extreme Couponing series on TLC, I gave it a shot. So far, I have a wonderful binder full of coupons, and since mid-May I've saved several hundred dollars off of retail cost!

The best feelings for me come from three main things: 1) having a nice, organized binder with all my coupons in their proper place; 2) getting free items; 3) finding items that make the store pay me to take them home!

I never realized how much I was spending on items. I never realized how much I could save on things that I use every week. I never realized how many new things I could try but that I was telling myself it was too expensive!

Here are some of the incorrect assumptions I used to make:

1. Store brands are ALWAYS the cheapest option.

Sometimes they are, but not always! When you group a store sale price, with a store coupon (if you can get it), with a manufacturer's coupon, you're in store for BIG savings on that name brand product! Compare prices post-coupon, though, and buy whatever is cheapest. The point is to save money afterall, right?

2. Buying the bigger package is cheaper.

Generally, buying the smallest size allowable when using a coupon will land you the most product for the least amount of money. The point is to get product without spending money. If you have a coupon for $1 off an item, and there are two choices - the small size that is $1.25 and the large size that is $3.50, which would you pick? Personally, I'd rather leave paying $.25 instead of $2.50. Since I often have more than one coupon, I can double or triple up on that $.25 product, and for $.50 to $.75, I can leave with as much product as one of the larger sizes that would have cost me $2.50. With a BOGOFree (Buy One, Get One Free) coupon, it's a personal thing. Do the math for yourself, and if you can afford one of the larger sizes to get the same size free, then go for it!

3. Trial sizes are just for travellers.

Closely reading you coupon is VERY important. If a coupon does NOT exclude trial sizes in its language, and you can find a trial size that meets the criteria of the coupon, get it! Oftentimes Walmart will sell a trial size item for $.97, and the corresponding coupon is $1 "any size" of that product. This means that you can add a $.03 credit to your total tab...in other words, you are getting paid to buy this item! BETTER THAN FREE!!

4. I'd better use this new coupon right now!

Manufacturers make coupons available at specific times. Most notably, they issue coupons for new products, and they want you to go out and buy them immediately! However, if you hold on to that coupon, chances are the store where you shop will eventually have a sale on that "new" item and may even issue their own store coupon. Reread #1!! Combine the sale price with a store coupon AND that manufacturer's coupon you've been holding on to, and you have one heckuva deal!!

5. Uh-oh...I need to use this coupon before it expires!

Just because you have a coupon does NOT mean you have to use it. It may be a great one, one that you were SOOOO looking forward to using, but if using it even ON its expiration date doesn't give you a cheap or free price, then let it go. The point is to save money, not just find a cheaper price. You can ease your frustration by mailing your expired coupons to a military shopper overseas....many are able to use expired coupons (up to 6 months expired) at their commissary store.

6. The only way I can really save is if I have a store that doubles coupons.

We have one higher-end, expensive store that doubles coupons up to $.60 daily and a dollar-type store that doubles up to the same amount only on Saturdays. Those are not stores where I usually shop, though. While I have not had the "extreme" coupon savings that I saw on TLC's Extreme Couponing, I HAVE saved money. I know that not everyone will be up for the time commitment of clipping coupons, organizing a binder, comparing store sales flyers, frequently visiting couponing websites, etc., but any savings is better than none. If you're into making a dent in your out-of-pocket, collecting a few coupons for products that you use regularly isn't time consuming or hard work at all....and if you have any leftover coupons, I'm happy to take them off your hands!

7. Crud, I'll never find a coupon for that product!

There are SO many places where you can get coupons. Sunday papers are great, especially if you can buy more than one copy, collect the Sunday coupons from friends and neighbors, track them down at coffee shops and libraries, dumpster-dive, etc. If you think you're only limited to your Sunday paper, though, think again.

There's a great monthly magazine sold at Walmart called All You. It has a nice mix of coupons from groceries to household to health and beauty. It was $1.88 the last time I purchased it, and it had over $50 of coupons inside.

There are coupon clipping services online where you can purchase specific coupons they have available for a nominal cutting fee plus a shipping/handling fee.

Lately, though, my favorite has been Ebay. Do a search for the product you use, i.e. "coca cola coupons," and you should have a list of auctions for small handfuls of coupons for your product. There are also Ebay sellers who will sell you an envelope full of random coupons. Search for "grocery coupons," and you'll be able to fatten up your coupon collection in no time and for very little money.

During your learning phase of couponing, you'll more than likely be reading an online forum somewhere. Chances are there are other forum registrants who are willing to trade/sell coupons, so search for what you want there. Also, several of the forums have a coupon database to search. Many of these coupons are internet-printable, so turn on that printer and get started! (Fair warning - most internet printables will only allow 2 prints. Multiple computers in your home, though, will net you more prints!)

Grocery stores GIVE AWAY coupons, too! And if you're not paying attention, you'll overlook them. What you sometimes notice as a red blinking paper-filled box, a pad of pages, small pieces of paper stuck onto products, or paper collars on bottles are, in the coupon world, referred to respectively as "blinkies," "tearpads," "peelies," and "hangtags." Take advantage of every one of these that you can find. You can use them immediately, especially the "peelies," or you can hang onto them for later. They are usually in fairly high demand because they are NOT found in the Sunday paper and not everyone has access to them. (Don't be greedy and steal them all, though. Do unto others, and share the wealth.)

There's so much to learn about couponing, but once you get the idea - and once you actually get out there and DO it - it's a lot of fun. The best part of it so far has been that for the first time in my life, I've picked up a hobby that does NOT cost me money!

My ACDF Surgery Experience

(Fair warning...long post)

Today is the one week anniversary of having ACDF (Anterior Cervical Diskectomy and Fusion) surgery. I had a herniated disc in my neck in the C5-6 area, thanks to an automobile accident. It was causing some pain in my neck and numbness in my left hand. I now have a small plate thingie screwed into two of my vertebrae, some adult stem-cell material living where my herniated disc used to be, and what I hope will turn out to be a cool scar on the front of my neck.

The surgery itself lasted approximately 1 hour, or so I’m told. I had it done as an outpatient procedure, beginning around 7:30am. I ended up staying in the hospital until approximately 4:00pm, if memory serves. (Please understand that morphine and other pain meds make my recollections of specific details a bit fuzzy.)

Two days before surgery, I had a consultation with my doctor and made all arrangements with the hospital. This included blood tests, urine tests, x-ray, EKG, etc. The following day, I found out that my white blood count was quite elevated. Unfortunately, this could delay my surgery. The medical professionals decided to wait until the following day and allow the anesthesiologist determine whether or not I would be allowed to have the surgery. Thankfully, I was determined to be healthy, even though the elevated white blood count indicated a possible infection somewhere that could potentially compromise my post-op health. To this day, the source of the infection remains unknown.

I woke up from surgery in recovery wearing a relatively small bandage (approx. 6” x 3” of gauze covered by a much larger piece of what felt and looked like very sticky plastic wrap) and a soft collar. I must be sensitive to anesthesia because I remember vomiting once. I was later wheeled into a room where my family was waiting for me. This is where things are really fuzzy. I think I was given morphine in the recovery area, so I was in and out for the next couple of hours. I was also given antibiotics later in the day to help with the potential infection. The next things I remember were trying to talk to my family, eating some ice chips, having a few visitors, and later being given a meal to eat. (FYI, this meal included Salisbury steak, cornbread, red potatoes, turnip greens, milk and applesauce, I think. I tell you the menu now because this will be humorous after the next couple of paragraphs.)

Eating has been the most interesting challenge. For the first couple of days particularly, I was unable to eat “normally”. Swallowing was just downright painful, even with pain meds. Also, I felt like I was going to choke or inhale bits of food after swallowing…like fluids or food was resting on a little shelf above my airway and would be sucked in on the next breath. It was a very panicky time for me. Even swallowing water was difficult – my throat was swollen, and more often than not, all of the water, even when I took smaller amounts, wouldn’t go down with one swallow. I definitely have had to take smaller mouthfuls of food and drink. I also found myself taking large breaths before swallowing, just in case I needed to cough something out that fell into my airway. I have also been using a dessert spoon instead of a regular spoon so that my bite portions are smaller. (I can’t open my mouth as far as I normally do, either.) When I get especially panicky, I stand up, really straight, to eat. I don’t know why exactly, but for some reason I feel more in control should there be a choking problem…like everything is now in a straight line down to my stomach with a lessened chance of choking. (I have no idea why my mind has chosen to fixate on this choking thing.)

My diet this week has been modified to soft, small-particle type foods. For example, my breakfasts usually include a combination of a couple of soft foods like a half of a banana, jell-o, a frozen fruit popsicle, fruit cocktail (preferably peaches), pudding, etc. I also keep a cup of water nearby, just in case. I have also been able to add spaghetti-o’s with meatballs, tomato soup, oatmeal, cheese and macaroni, and mashed potatoes to my menu choices over the past few days. Everything with any substance must be chewed thoroughly, else larger food particles get stuck in my throat. (Unfortunately, I discovered yesterday that I could eat Peanut Butter M&M’s, too!)

I sensed I needed to be careful about what I ate because some foods create more mucus in my throat than others. To me, mucus = additional swallowing, possibly choking. I find myself drinking water more than anything else. Though some of my foods are liquid, or liquid based, like soup and popsicles, water tends to cut the mucus created by other foods best. Things that are milk-based, like ice cream, isn’t so friendly to my throat. While the cold feels good, the mucus that’s left behind isn’t worth it to me. Not everyone has mucus problems after milk products, but for me, it’s just something I get to look forward to. Carbonated beverages don’t feel so great to me. The bubbling is something of a burning sensation, and any resulting burp has been a little painful…it’s a relief, but it hurts. I’m not a real fan of carbonated beverages on a normal day, so maybe that has something to do with it, too.

Now, you need to understand that I’m no svelte model. I’m VERY…‘healthy’. Let’s just say that I weigh more than my 6’ tall husband, and I shop from women’s sizes. So, not being able to eat was a disappointment and a shock. In my mind, considering nothing was cut inside my esophagus, I figured eating would be a whole lot simpler than it has been. Though I don’t know for sure, my guess is that the swelling from the surrounding tissues is hampering normal swallowing. I hoped that this would calm down after a few days, but my guess is that it won’t return to normal until after around 4 weeks, when the swollen tissues are far less inflamed.

Bathing was interesting for the first couple of days. I was told not to get the bandages wet under any circumstances, but I knew I needed to bathe and wash my hair. What ended up working best for me was to take a shower and bathe as much as possible by myself. Then, here’s where I enlisted help. I asked either my mother or my husband to wash my back and my hair (because lifting my arms was difficult). Thankfully, we have one of those shower heads that has a long hose and hangs from a little holder – similar to a sprayer on the side of the sink. I bent over approximately halfway, folded a thick towel up and held it over the front side of my neck, covering my bandages very well, and had my Mom or husband carefully wet my head, wash my hair, and rinse me as quickly as they could. (FYI, my post-op orders said to limit bending and lifting.) This worked very well, in my opinion. As long as we avoided allowing the water to flow over my neck excessively and moved the process along fairly quickly, the towel absorbed any water that did run towards my chin before it got to the bandages.

By the way, ladies, since lifting my arms has been difficult, getting a sports bra that hooks in the front and one of those mu-mu style house coats with the front snaps has been a wonderful decision. I look like heck run over, but I have been completely and utterly comfortable and well-covered for visitors.

Sleeping has probably been one of the toughest things to figure out. I don’t know if I am wanting a different position for comfort each night, or what. I have been sleeping on the couch since the surgery. It allows me to sleep upright much easier, and this is how I feel most comfortable. I have slept in my soft collar every night but one (and I try to keep it on about half the time during the day, just in case). My preferred sleeping position seems to be VERY elevated from the hip up, keeping my neck as straight as possible. This usually involves about 5+ pillows against the arm of the sofa. Normally, I am more of a side sleeper and have a difficult time sleeping on my back. So, sleeping in a recliner is out. I found that if I laid on my back in a recliner or against the elevated pillows, I would either frequently wake up because I was uncomfortable or because I am snoring. I am just following my instincts on sleeping for now, even though sometimes it takes me about an hour to get situated into a comfortable position.

Speaking has been different. The larynx is unable to move as freely because of the swelling, I assume, so higher pitched speaking has been impossible. It’s also been difficult to speak louder. I also seem to walk with my head down a bit if I’m not wearing my soft collar. It feels like my head weighs more than it did before surgery, and my shoulders could use a massage to relax a little. (Of course, the thought of someone pressing on my neck and shoulders at the moment makes me queasy, so I’ll just put that massage on hold for now.)

After removing the outer bandage, I noticed that my incision is covered by a few pieces of surgical tape – the kind with strings in it. I saw no stitches but some clear sticky stuff below the surgical tape, so I am assuming that my incision has been glued shut. This is my first experience with glue (and only my second surgical experience, my first being a tonsillectomy), so I am curious how this will go. I was told that I could remove my outer bandage on the 5th post-op day, but I am not allowed to remove the surgical tape over the glue. This should all be allowed to come off on its own.

I was given a prescription for Tylox 5-500mg capsules, a combination of Tylenol and oxycodone, to take 2 capsules every 6 hours as needed. I never took the maximum amount of pain medication, usually taking only 1 pill every 5-6 hours. Honestly, I never felt like I needed it. My last dose of tylox was the evening of the 3rd or 4th day. Just before bedtime, I sensed that the previous dose had worn off, so I took one to help me sleep that night.

Since stopping my pain meds, there has been discomfort, but it’s certainly nothing that has kept me awake or hampered my abilities in any way. There is still some discomfort swallowing, but it gets a tiny bit better every day. If I can settle into a comfortable sleeping position, I can sleep through the night and usually only wake up once…this has been the case for the past 3 nights. My neck and shoulders hurt, but I think it’s because I’m holding them in a tense position to try to keep my chin/face aligned with the center of my chest to avoid turning my head.

At one point, I wondered if I was “normal” in my recovery. So, I got online to read about the post-op experiences of other people. I found that most of them had procedures that were more involved than mine, for example, they included reparations/fusions including more than one disc/vertebrae and required more hardware. To be honest, these stories didn’t help me at all. In fact, they just scared me. I got the impression that I was reading the “worst case scenarios,” so I quit reading and decided to just pay attention to what my own body was experiencing. I’ve been much calmer since, and I find that I can notice my own healing a whole lot better when I’m only comparing MY current experiences to MY previous experiences. Don’t get me wrong – I think one should be fairly well educated, especially about surgical procedures and expectations. I just think that in this day and age of computer information availability, we can get too much of the wrong information just as easily as we can get the correct and helpful kind. I have decided that as long as I am better today than I was yesterday, I am happy and calm.

The time has passed quickly since the surgery, once I got through those first couple of days. I would definitely recommend that you have help for at least 2 days afterwards. Stock up on soft foods such as those listed above. Don’t try to yell or speak louder – keep the remote with the mute button nearby, along with the phone. And just know that as soon as you swallow something you’re trying your best to eat carefully, that phone is going to ring. J

If you have any questions or if something is unclear, please feel free to write me. I’m a no-surprises kind of person, and if I can help, I surely will.

Tagged Again!

Christie tagged me again, so here are my answers:

Favorite person (outside family)?
Well, it depends on the day, but I'm constantly thinking about my husband, my mother, my father, my best friend Christie, my cousin Melonea and my friends Rosella and Jami.

Favorite Food?
I'd have to say Ward's chili dogs or a bologna sandwich (thick sliced bologna, fresh white bread and mayo). What is it with me and processed meat?!?

Quirks about you?
I think I'm a little OCD. I don't like to use typo shortcuts like "lol" or "c u l8r", so I type everything out properly. I also have this 'evenness' thing...like if I crack one knuckle, I have to try to crack the same one on the opposite hand; or if I clean under one fingernail, I have to do the same one on the other hand - it mostly has to do with my hands for some reason.

How would the person who loves you most describe you in ten words or less?
Goofy, silly, lazy, watches movies and tv too much.

Any regrets in life?
Not recognizing the sacrifices my parents made for me while they were being made.

Favorite Charity?
American Cancer Society, A Better Way Ministries (Moss Point, MS), ASPCA

Favorite Blog recently?
Christie's

Something you can’t get enough of?
Food, attention, rest, money, etc., etc., etc.

Worst job you’ve ever had?
The Williams job in Hendersonville/Nashville...I was bored, didn't want to do the work, had to clean the bathroom after about 20 men in order to use it myself, worked with a man who smoked cigars incessantly in an enclosed office (I eventually put a fan in his office window) - and there was a "no smoking" sign on the door, I didn't enjoy the town that much (though I didn't really try - no offense, Nashville), etc.

What job would you pay NOT to have?
A file clerk. I detest filing.

If you could be a fly on the wall, where?
If I were an actual fly, I'd probably want to be living in some nice pig pen somewhere. Otherwise, I'd want to be in the room when they decide who, besides me clearly, will be getting these teaching jobs. There is apparently something I need to learn.

Favorite Bible verse right now?
Almost always has been Psalm 23.

Guilty Pleasure?
Reality shows like Rock of Love and Flavor of Love

Got any confessions?
Are you kidding?!?

If you HAD to spend $1,000 on YOURSELF, how would you spend it?
I'd either buy a Blu-ray DVD player or maybe have $1k worth of liposuction done.

Favorite thing about your house?
It's mine, I feel safe and hidden in it, and it's in my hometown.

Least favorite thing about your house?
It's a trailer...I wish it were a house.

One thing you are bad at?
STAYING self-motivated

One thing you’re good at?
Singing

If you could change something about your circumstances, what?
I'd have a job, we'd be moved to a GREAT city but would live out in the sort-of-country (in a house!), and we'd be debt-free.

Who would you like to meet someday?
I wish I could have known my grandfather when I was an adult. I don't remember him, but there's just something about him in my mind... I'd like to meet someone who would make a fantastic president of the US.

What makes you feel sexy?
When I feel like I'm having a 'skinny day'.

Who is your real life hero?
I dunno...My husband probably sets the best example of overcoming incredible obstacles in life while still keeping his nose toward heaven, bettering himself, and moving forward. My Mom has accomplished so much in her life and set a great example as a professional woman. My father has set a great example of following your heart and doing exactly what you want to make your life better.

What is the hardest part of your job?
The times when there isn't much to do. I get bored.

When are you most relaxed?
In the evening after dinner when I'm lying on the couch, watching TV or a movie, and I'm thinking I should be heading to bed soon.

What stresses you out?
Talking about money with my husband or thinking about my dissertation project.

What can you not live without?
Okay, I'll go along with the air conditioning thing, too. Also, some kind of pet/animal interaction...I miss that a lot when it's not there.

Do you agree or disagree with the recent article that reported that blogs are authored by narcissists?
Well, since I've not read many of them, I can safely say that I don't think I've read any narcissistic blogs.

Why do you blog?
It's Christie's fault! I don't do it that often, but it's a good way to flush stuff out and look at it.

Atlantic City

I just got back from a trip to Atlantic City, NJ, with my Mom. I'd never been there before, and honestly, I enjoyed myself for the 3 days I was there. (Between you and me, I enjoy a little gambling but my goodness, AC is a dangerous place! It seemed like every time I walked near a slot machine, my money was mysteriously stolen from my purse! *cough*) Mom and I ended up at the Boardwalk for 2 of those days. It was a fun place, good for a day's worth of entertainment, and EXCELLENT for walk-ercising and/or keeping you out of the casinos. We took in Ripley's 'Believe it or Not' Museum, people-watched, waded in the Atlantic and collected shells, and enjoyed a funnel cake with the seagulls! They ate right from my hand! And I can also tell you where to buy tampons on the Boardwalk, should you be interested. (Ugh...it was only a 3 day vacation...why?!?) I'm also proud to report, even though I was quite nervous about this, we thankfully only ate one buffet the entire time we were there. So I maintained my girlish figure. (HA.) (I'll post a couple of goofy pictures soon.)

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

My life seems to change every day. And the older I get the less I like change. Being keenly aware of this potential for change, it's sometimes tough to just get out of bed in the morning - mostly because the first thing that will be changed is the litter box, and I'd prefer to avoid that for the most part.

Strangely enough, I'm in a holding pattern right now, waiting to turn the next corner...waiting for the next change...and anticipating change is just as difficult for me as dealing with it. I'm looking for a job at a university, and I'm supposed to be finishing my dissertation. (God willing, I'll be done by December graduation.) If I do get a job, I'll be moving. I reeeeaaaally don't like moving. I've done it so frequently, it seems...since 1987 I have lived in 11 different places. You'd think it would be 'old hat' by now. Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those irresponsible types who just camp out somewhere as long as the owner lets them. I pay my rent and my bills on time. I don't leave a string of IOU's behind. I've always gotten my deposits back. I've never been evicted. The only call from a collection agency I've ever gotten was a mistake. I just moved frequently because of work or school. Anyway, I'm tired of moving and I want to be permanently planted. If I feel the need to see anymore of the country, or the world for that matter, I'll leave from and return to my home instead of being moved there. So, God willing, I'll land somewhere that will love me for the rest of my teaching career and into retirement.

There are a few changes I'm looking forward to, though...buying or building a house of my own, retiring, starting new hobbies, going to a church of my choice instead of being a paid choir section leader somewhere, getting involved in a community, being debt-free, having enough money to join the local Y, and maybe having a child of our own. We'll wait and see what God has planned. Until then, say prayers that I'll not bite my nails down to the nubs. (Maybe once I have that new job, I'll get my acrylic nails back. Yeah, that's another thing I'm looking forward to!)

Scattergories

It's harder than it looks! Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following... They have to be real places, names, things... nothing made up! You CAN'T use your name for the boy/girl.

1. What is your name? Shelly

2. 4 letter word: Spit

3. Vehicle: Saab

4. City: San Francisco

5. Boy Name: Stan

6. Girl Name: Sara

7. Alcoholic drink: Sloe Gin Fizz

8. Occupation: Singer

9. Something you wear: Slip

10. Celebrity: Sean Connery

11. Food: Shrimp

12. Something found in a bathroom: Soap

13. Reason for Being Late: Stopped by the police

14. Cartoon Character: Snoopy

15. Something You Shout: Shut up!

16. Animal: Snake

17. Body part: Shin

18. Describe you: Special (interpret that however you like :) )

(Ooo...now I get to tag someone before they tag me for the first time...Christie, you're it! And of course anyone else who reads this, feel free to consider yourself 'tagged'.)

Are You A Frugal Shopper Or A Big Spender?

I was tagged by Christie (again!) and asked to answer the following questions.

The directions given were: "How much did you spend on the following items the last time you purchased them and what brand(s) did you buy?" Here are my answers.

Lipstick
Dollar store brand (Everything's a Dollar) pink lip gloss $1.00

Shoes for Yourself
Black ballet flats with sequin bows and black heels, both from Payless $25.00 total

Bread
Wonder Light $2.73

Movie Ticket
Atonement matinee $6.75 <-- isn't this NUTS?!?!

Television
Sony 32" Trinitron AND an RCA 36" flat screen $55.00 total at the state auction

Take-Out Meal
Sushi and edamame at Wahada $15.00

Hairspray
Big Sexy Hairspray ~$10.00

Underwear for Yourself
Lane Bryant bras on sale, Buy 2 get 1 free, I think. But I paid with a gift certificate, so they were technically free to me...otherwise, they would've been around $50 total, I think. I pretty much only buy underwear with gift certificates from Lane Bryant.

Gift for Your Spouse
Either a pair of WalMart Levis for $4.50 or a Valentine's card for around $3.00...can't remember which came last

Bottled Water
Voss 'still' $2.99

Hotel Room
I can't remember the last time I stayed in a hotel room... :-\

Frozen Dinner
Smart Ones Creamy Rigatoni with Broccoli and Chicken $1.72

Clothing For Your Child
No kids, so I guess this would have to be the WalMart collars for the cats from goodness-knows-how-many years ago...no idea the price

Jeans for Yourself
Well, before the free ones I got as hand-me-down Gap jeans from another student, it would have to be the ones I found at America's Thrift Store for probably around $5.00

Kitchen Utensils
I haven't purchased a kitchen utensil in years, but I received a Hamilton Beach dispenser-type coffee maker a couple of Christmases ago...then again, we bought an off-brand microwave for the hubby to use on the road at the Salvation Army for about $15 I think.

Bubble Bath
I don't take baths, so no bubble bath. If I wanted to take a bubble bath, I'd just use shampoo.

OTC Medication
WalMart brand robitussin $5?

Shoes for Your Spouse
I don't buy shoes for my spouse unless he just doesn't have his debit card with him.

Haircut for Yourself
Regis $36.00 with tip

Scented Candle
Darsee & David's Butterscotch Sundae from Hobby Lobby on sale $5?

DVD
Catch Me If You Can from WalMart $5.50

Dry Cleaning
Lord...I think I was living in Bloomington, IN. It's been too long...can't remember.

Shampoo/Conditioner
Dove Moisturizing $4?, and Big Sexy Hair Big Volume Conditioner $7.25

Barbeque Sauce
Bullseye BBQ $4?

Book
I'm a public library girl, and I get them on CD. If music counts, I just ordered a used Elijah score for about $8.

(I think it's pretty clear that I'm a frugal person on most everything. How depressing.)

Yes, you guessed it. If you're reading this, tag, you're it!!

7 Strange Things About Me

I guess it's my turn again to be tagged. So, I'm going to completely copy the format of the tagger!

My friend Christie just tagged me on her blog Our Red Thread Journey!!! I am supposed to list 7 weird/strange things about me! I suppose the purpose of this exercise is to reveal wierd things about me that noone knows.

#1 - My favorite food is hot dogs. Not necessarily with the bun and the chili and mustard, etc., but more specifically, just the hot dog part. I'll eat them frozen, thawed, microwaved and/or boiled. I love 'em. I can eat a whole entire package in one sitting, but I choose not to do that anymore...the guilt just kills me!

#2 - I've never been to Europe. Being an opera singer and having never been to Europe is really an oddity. I'd love to go, and I have a savings account we refer to as my "Europe money," but with the euro the way it is, I may as well spend my money on something like plasma tv's.

#3 - I like to be as grammatically and 'punctually' correct as possible when I write emails or posts online. I like to capitalize the beginnings of my sentences, I like to insert apostrophes, and I don't use abbreviations like "c u soon" or "rotfl"...that drives me crazy. I'm actually a bit anal about it.

#4 - About 75% of the time, if I'm trying to choose a check-out lane at WalMart, I will choose the line that is about to have a problem...the cashier will need to do a price check or have to call her supervisor for an override, the customer doesn't have enough money and will need to return item by item, etc. I don't quite know why this is, but I'm learning how to immediately get a trashy magazine to read through BEFORE the problem arises. Oh, and changing lanes once a problem is evident doesn't always help...another problem will usually pop up in the new lane.

#5 - My biggest fear as a singer is thinking I'm going to forget my words. There have been times when I can't remember words and they come to me at literally the final last split seconds, times when, in a fit of frustration, I have inserted wrong words that still fit (even in foreign languages), and there have been times that I've had total blanks for a few measures. Nothing unsettles me on stage like forgetting my words.

#6 - I am an only child. Furthermore, I am the last of the Buchanan-named line. It all ends with me.

#7 - Other peoples' extraneous body hair in places other than on their body gives me the willies. Hair on the sink, in the tub, on chairs, on the carpet, etc., just gives me a weird feeling. And if I'm at a concert, and the person in front of me has a 'wild hair' on their clothing, I'm completely fixated on it almost the entire time and want very badly to remove it. If I can without being detected, I definitely will.

And again, since I don't really know anyone to tag, if you're reading this, you're it! :)

I Finally Feel Like a Scholastic "Adult"

Well, this LSU Tiger is one relieved kitty. Last Thursday was my final required student recital, this past Wednesday morning was my oral general exam (the last portion of my general exam...basically, the final exam of everything that I've studied in music up to this point), and last night I sang a beautiful Mahler piece, "Um Mitternacht", with the LSU Wind Ensemble. It was a lot to do within a week's time, but somehow I managed it, with God's help.

The interesting thing is that, upon waking this morning, I realized that I have no homework, no test to study for and no music to practice. It's strange...and WONDERFUL!!!

I am SO grateful for the success I've experienced in the past week, and I owe it all to the strength and endurance I've been blessed with lately. Normally, I would have much less hair (yes, my hair falls out when I'm super-stressed...it's quite lovely), but this time, God blessed me with all the above AND keeping my hair. :) Thank you, God, for EVERYTHING.

So, my plan for the upcoming weekend includes renting movies (which I will more than likely watch in my undies and a hair clippy - period), going out to eat (I will, of course, dress appropriately for this) and futzing around the house a lot, annoying my kitties. I predict it's going to be a truly spectacular weekend...I'm wondering if I can finagle that expensive seafood buffet out of the hubby....hmm... :)

I wish to extend a HUGE thanks to everyone who supported and encouraged me, and stood by my side during the past several years of school and the time when I was just trying to figure out what the heck to do with my life. To my dear husband who pushes me when I believe I have nothing left because he sees the best in me when I don't sometimes ... To my loving Mom who set the example of forward motion, no matter what ... To my protective Dad who loves and supports me and is always proud of my accomplishments ... To my best friend Christie who I know in my heart of hearts is always by my side and a phone call away ... To Jami and Rosella whose friendship and support through this "thing" they call a doctorate have been priceless ... To God who blesses me abundantly without reason! ... Thank you ALL.

My Recital

Tonight is an important night. I'm giving my second doctoral recital at 6:00pm. I have my music memorized...pretty much. (Clarification...when my mind is engaged like it needs to be, I can get through my music without a problem.) I have my program notes ready to be copied, and I've bought gifts for everyone who needs one, with one exception...will do that this afternoon.

The problem now is that I'm incredibly anxious. (And I suggest you read the word "anxious" as deriving from the same root as "anxiety" and having little to do with the more commonly assumed definition that is closer to the word "eager.") My insides are in little knots, about every hour, I get this pang of fear that shoots through my body, I question whether or not I'm ready, I find myself waking up in the middle of the night frantically reciting the words to my music, etc.

There are things that may have attributed to this, I suppose. I waited til the last minute to memorize my music (though in between I was preparing for my general exams). I had my wreck back in January, so the next 6-8 months were vocally lost to pain meds and steroids. My teacher has started a new opera company and has enlisted my help, which took a good bit of my time. The new opera company's debut was last Saturday, so for the previous two weeks I had no voice lesson...not to mention that, since I usually have my lessons on Thursdays, I won't have one today either in favor of saving my voice for this evening. My accompanist's father passed away in the last month, so she was out prior to his passing, enjoying his company as much as she could...I don't fault her for that, mind you. I just wish I had more rehearsal time.

Anyway, again I ask for your prayers. At this point, I know there is little more I can do to get myself prepared for tonight, so I have decided to let go and give it all to God and let Him work it out for me. If I mess up, it's going to be okay. If I forget an word or an entrance, oh well. God willing, though, He will strengthen my mind and my body and give me the words and energy to give a glorious and entertaining performance. I look forward to hearing His miracles tonight, and I hope my audience does too!

Sometimes Life Isn't Fair

About a week ago, someone relieved my husband of all his tools from inside his locked truck box. Among these were tools his father had used that were well over 30 years old. The building next door has security cameras, and the security contact informed us that their tapes indeed showed a small group of men taking his tools...at 9:30pm, just off a main road...they just pulled up and helped themselves. We're in the process of trying to acquire a copy of the tape.

If you've EVER been the victim of theft, especially with items of sentimental value, you know how it feels like someone has literally dug out your stomach with a rusty tablespoon. You frantically go through all the possible scenarios of what you should or could have done differently to prevent it, or what you can do now to get your possessions back or just get even with whoever targeted you. The sick feeling comes from just knowing in the back of your head that there isn't a darn thing you can do about it, though. It's quite a helpless feeling, and it's worsened when you don't know who your victimizer is. It's sad, too, when you find yourself suspicious of your neighbors, co-workers, etc.

So, prayers would be appreciated for my husband right now who is mourning the loss of items that are really precious to him, provide him with great enjoyment, and that, in a way, define a part of who he is. I think he needs it. (Be sure to include in your prayers that Lowe's, Sears and Harbor Freight have some GREAT upcoming sales! :) )

One more...

I got tagged again, plus I love these things, so here goes...
1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car) ...Neko Explorer
2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (favorite ice cream flavor, favorite cookie) ...Rocky Road Sugar Wafer
3. YOUR “FLY GIRL” NAME: (first initial of first name, first 3 letters of last name) ...S-Gar
4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal) ...Blue Cat
5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born) ...Lenn Hattiesburg
6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first) ...Gar-Sh
7. SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink) ...The Yellow Chocolate Milk
8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers) ...Hugh Lenard
9. STRIPPER NAME: ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy) ...Chanel Snickers
10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names) ...Lenn Duncan
11. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter) ...Presley Paris
12. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower) ...Fall Lantana
13. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + “ie” or “y”) ...Cherry Flopsy
14. HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree) ...Scooters Gingko
15. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather + “Tour”) ...The Jewelry Overcast Tour
Well, that was fun. Now, if you're reading this, it's your turn!

Samples

I think I can safely admit thatI am a sample slut. I am completely addicted to going to Walmart's homepage and checking out the samples they offer. I'm also one of those who, after seeing a commercial advertising a free sample, makes you mad because they are already preventing your connection to the website because they beat you there.

So, if anyone sees any commercials for free samples, feel free to leave me a comment with the link or phone number. (And for the record, I really dispise the free sample websites that make you fill out ENDLESS surveys and/or require that you "complete 37 of these offers to qualify for your stick of chewing gum". So if you have one of those, no, thank you! Keep it to yourself!)

I really do recommend Walmart.com's site, though. On the right-hand side of the page, click on "In Stores Now" and then "FREE Samples". Currently, they have samples of Goodnites for children, Huggies diapers, Sunsilk hair products and Folger's Gourmet Selections coffee!

ALREADY?!?

I just happened to see a man in a Santa suit on television the other night, and oh my goodness, am I ready for the holiday season to arrive! Since then, I've been sniffing for the coolness in the air (though in southern Louisiana, it ain't here yet!), craving spice cookies, soups, stews and chilis, humming Christmas music, wondering about what to get or make people for Christmas gifts, and wanting to redecorate in red and green! Aaahhh!! That was quick! The weather-people are predicting a cool snap near the end of this week, regardless of the fact that it will happen during the evening with lows in the 60's instead of 70's while the highs remain in the lower 90's during the day...bleh. But cool weather in any form, especially now, is incredibly welcome and will probably put me right over the edge. My prediction is that in the next week, I will have my first Christmas gift purchase. (This will be my usual first gift purchase of a special ornament for my best friend, Christie.) I hope and pray that this holiday season will be a great one because when I get "the bug" this early, I usually have high expectations when the time gets here. So, Merry Christmas, y'all!

Ahhhh....I need a drink.

Well, I made it through. I finished my paper on time, actually a day early, and my written exams are behind me. I will have my oral exams in the next month, I'm guessing. (You have to request a time at least 3 weeks prior to the date..had I known that before 2 days ago, I would have requested it 2 weeks ago.) Anyway, it's behind me. I did...okay. Parts were good, and other parts I wished I'd done better on. But then again, if I'd have done perfectly, there would be nothing to discuss in my orals. I've not gotten any proper feedback, so I don't know how I did "officially".

So, a couple of friends of mine and I will be celebrating this evening (I'm up too late to say 'tomorrow') by having a sleep-over/movie party. We plan to be, as we say, "d-runk"...to translate, that's just another way of saying really, really drunk. The three of us studied together, tested together and will be d-runk together by probably 6pm tomorrow evening. I've even made zero-point sweet & sour mixer. With tequila at 2pts a shot, we need to save all the points we can!..and we plan to use bunches of our week's flex points on alcohol!! (FYI...While it may sound like it, I'm not an alcoholic, this is a huge celebration, we're all of legal drinking age, and we won't be driving.)

Thanks for the prayers and well-wishes, and know that they are appreciated. Gee...now that the written exams are finished, I have some time to relax and clean the house...and cook for hubby...and do his laundry...and run errands...and grocery shop......HELP! :)